Gifts for Video Nerds (Obsessive DSLR Dork Edition)

Video nerds are a special breed. Photography geeks can inhabit a false sense of glamour. They can imagine that they’ll eventually be shooting supermodels for the cover of a glossy. Audio nerds can cling to a similar shred of unrealistic hope. Right now they may be shoving a beltpack transmitter into a fat, sweaty pastry chef’s underwear, but a year from now they may well be producing the next Sgt Pepper’s. Video nerds don’t really have an unrealistic ideal to keep them going. I guess they can daydream that they’re George Lucas’ cinematographer, sitting atop a large crane with a camera rig, squinting while making an imaginary frame with their thumbs and index fingers. But let’s face it. That person still comes off as a dork.

If you’re like me and spend most of your time dreaming about cameras and gear that you have no excuse to buy, then it’s time that you woke up. It’s the holiday season, and it’s going by quickly. This isn’t your opportunity to get those camera bodies and all that wonderful glass. But this is your chance to get all of the little doo-dads that you need to support them. It’s Christmas time! Don’t tell people you don’t know what you want! You know damn well what you want.

If you convince enough friends and family and anyone else who may be buying you gifts to pick up some of these video accessories, you’ll have more money later to put towards the truly exciting stuff. Primes. Wides. And the next generation of that current model of camera that you want (you know, the one that’s still so new that it’s not even in stock at any stores yet).

1) Tell them you want a DSC Labs test chart

I love these things, and I honestly don’t know why. I think they look great as art. They are the Mona Lisa that should hang in every aspiring DP’s man cave. [NOTE: No disrespect to female video nerds, I just wanted to use the term “man cave.” It’s fun.]

Since the whole DSLR revolution kicked off, I feel like I’m learning everything for the first time. I first really noticed these test charts over the past couple of years. People use them to calibrate their cameras. They’re useful for the post production crew too because they’ll have a better sense of what was going on with the camera on set.

Now here’s the problem… these puppies are expensive. The really pro DSC Labs charts cost several thousand dollars. So yeah, those models are out the window right from the start. But they do make a decent sized kit with two charts called the FrontBox College – 11 Step Grayscale Test Chart, which features a “spectrophotometrically neutral 11 step grayscale.”  That’s pure video nerd talk, and damnit I like it. What’s great is that these aren’t too small (9.5 x 11″ – hey, it beats the pocket sized ones), and they’re affordable enough to ask for as a present. This is the golden hour, friend. The season will be over in the bat of an eye. You know what to do.

2) Tell them you want a clapper slate… they’ll dig it!

Everyone knows what a clapper slate is, they just didn’t know what it was called. Nor do they understand why it is used. But they don’t care. If your grandma or grandpa is buying this for you, they’ll have a fun time playing with it on Christmas morning, pretending to be actors and directors. The family will have a ball with this thing!

And when all is said and done, you’ll have an awesome clapper to use to sync the audio on your next DSLR shoot. The one I own and use is the Pearstone SADC-711 (the one with color bars). I’ve had it for over a year now and so far so good. There was recently a good thread over at www.jwsound.net about how the color bars are kind us useless on slates, and the people just buy them because the look cooler (guilty as charged!). The black and white bars are actually a little more useful because they’re easier to see in low light. The Pearstone SADB-711 is the exact same clapper with black and white bars (and it’s five bucks cheaper!). You can go super budget friendly by asking for the Pearstone SWC-7363 Wooden Chalk Clapper. Look out, Hollywood!

3) Go for the gold! Ask for an on-camera portable digital recorder kit!

Now that you’ve got that great clapper, you’re going to need an external audio recorder so you can sync sound and video in post. You can familiarize yourself with the idea of mounting your recorder to the top of a DSLR with the information in my last post.

You need a Sescom cable and a camera shoe mount to do it. This can be done with the Zoom H4n, Zoom H1, and the Tascam DR-07.

4) Screw it. We’re video nerds. Ask for a video camera!

Not every camera you shoot with has to be a DSLR with a large sensor and an insane lens. Those are wonderful things, but having a simple video camera for quick little shoots is also a very useful thing. This might sound like you’re asking for too much, but there is an insane deal right now on the Canon VIXIA HF R100. It’s a real Canon that can shoot 1080i high def onto SD cards, and for a short time you can steal one for $250. No kidding.

Best of all, this little camera has an external mic input and shoots 24p. The door closes on this deal on December 25th 2010. If you’re a person from the future and you stumbled upon this post, I’d like to say in advance that I’m sorry.

5) Get a light kit! You’ll need it…

Yes, one of the great things about the DSLR revolution is that you can work in low light. Pump up the ISO, open the aperture, work by candlelight, all that good stuff. But let’s face it. This isn’t best to always work this way. Having a couple of good lights around will go a long way when you’re shooting an interview. And if you’re an indie filmaker, you don’t want to cut the art of lighting out of your work completely. Like it or not, lights are going to remain a big part of video production, so you may as well use this holiday gift season to cover that base.

One good way to do this is with the Impact VA902 Fluorescent Cool Light Two Fixture Kit. The operative word here is “cool,” as in – not burning your hands while making adjustments cool. Both lights output 90 watts each, and diffusers are included that fit over the front, giving you two bright softbox style lights. Two stands are included that extend up to six feet. Just get these lights. Yeah, it would be better to have an Arri 650Plus kit, but having these around is a billion times better than nothing.

So there you go. Get on the ball. The clock is ticking. You can make things even more interesting by asking for a big roll of Gaffer’s Tape for your stocking.

No matter what you’re celebrating this season (even if you choose to celebrate nothing at all), I’d like to wish everybody a happy December, at the very least. 2011 is going to rock, and it’s all going to be caught on tape… thanks to us.