Gifts for Sound Freaks (Audio Nerd Edition)

It’s going to happen to you in the next few days and weeks. Your friends and family will unexpectedly corner you and ask you what gifts you want for the holidays. Despite the fact that you spend much of the year dreaming about buying production equipment, you will draw completely blank. Your loved ones will rightfully be annoyed when you answer “I don’t know,” because they know you dream about gear all day. Their problem is that they don’t know the first thing about gear you desire. It’s all a bunch of gobble-dee-gook to them. You’ve got to be prepared for this question, otherwise you’ll end up with a pair of cassette tape cufflinks this year.

To help you out, I created this list of equipment gift ideas. I want to ease the burden for both parties involved. Instead of merely giving you suggestions, you can send your friends and family directly to this post and say “Here, buy me anything on this list. I like all of this stuff.” Here’s the direct link:

https://www.sam-mallery.com/archives/795

1) Duh… Why not ask for a really good microphone cable?

Every audio freak needs XLR cables. We all own them already, but who doesn’t need another really good cable laying around? Okay. It’s not a sexy gift. It’s not exciting. Your friends and family will think you’re weird for asking for a cord. But I’ll tell you what… Canare XLR cables rule.

Don’t draw a blank. Don’t end up with an ugly sweater! Ask for a Canare XLR. They’re plain, simple, and awesome. Of all of the crap I’ve bought myself over the past five years, I think I’ve gotten the most mileage out of my 25 foot Canare XLR. Yeah, it kind of hurt to spend over $30 on a single mic cable, but it’s been good to me. Really good.

The great thing about Canare XLR cables is that they don’t have to be completely boring. They come in a variety of fun colors. Here’s a few colorful 15 footers that are a little less expensive:

You can’t go wrong with a 15 foot blue Canare XLR cable. The cool thing about having a blue XLR cable is, well, that it’s blue. When you have all of your cable stored somewhere, you’ll be able to see the blue XLR cable easily. You’ll be like: “I need a good cable, oh, there’s my blue Canare. Awesome. I’ll use that!”

Another option is a 15 foot green Canare XLR cable. This is the color I currently own. Man, I love this cable. One of the great things about Canare StarQuad cable (which is the stuff all of these cables are made of) is that it’s so flexible. It’s easy to bend around stuff, and it feels nice to the touch. It even smells good. Okay. I’m nuts.

2) This is your chance to get a cable tester!

Dude, how long have you wanted a cable tester? Totally! I know, right? Duh! Ask for a cable tester! You may not need one today, but you KNOW you will need one eventually. A good model to ask for is this basic Whirlwind Audio Cable Tester. It’s $76.50, so it’s not the cheapest present, but a good one none-the-less. I mean, the model you really want is the Whirlwind Q-Box, but that one is $100 more. Ahh… It’s all too easy to go down the rabbit hole of expensive audio gear. I’ll do my best to avoid that in this post. I sort of promise…

3) Screw being reasonable! Ask for this fancy stereo mic bar!

Okay, this isn’t exactly a list of inexpensive gift ideas for audio freaks. But let’s just take one moment to check out this really nice piece of gear. What we have here is the Grace Design SB-30 Spacebar. It’s a bar that you attach to the end of a microphone stand. It allows you to position two microphones in stereo configurations. This is basically a really fancy version of a regular stereo bar that you can get for like $20 (the Grace Design SB-30 is $300. Yeah.). What makes the SB-30 different is that it has all of these measurement makers all over it, so you can get really snooty and precise when you’re positioning your mics.

Buy hey, while we’re at it, you don’t have to get a fancy stereo bar like the Grace (even though it would be really, really nice). You can just ask for a regular stereo bar, like this Rode SB20.

4) Do not underestimate the POWER of the Adapt-A-Pak

The thumbnail image to the left is a thing of sheer beauty. Is it boring? Yes. Is it inexpensive? Not really. Is it the kind of thing an audio nerd will keep and use for the rest of their life? Absolutely! Will it save their butt numerous times throughout the year? Yes.

What is it? It’s a plastic case with separators that’s filled with all kinds of audio adapters. It allows you to plug anything into anything. That may seem dull, but it’s not. It’s incredibly empowering for an audio nerd.

The Adapt-A-Pak comes in two flavors. There’s the Adapt-A-Pak LT (which is pictured above), which comes with 27 different adapters. Then there’s the big momma of them all, the full-on big bastard Adapt-A-Pak extreme, which comes with 55 adapters. That’s the one I own, and I’ll be damned if it’s not the finest collection of physical objects on the planet. Big thanks to my mom for hooking me up with that last Christmas!

5) Velcro ties are dead boring, but we love them

Yeah, there’s been lots of seemingly dull products in this list, but this one takes the plain, vanilla cake. Audio cable velcro ties are gift magic for audio nerds. We stick them on our cables and organize them. But this isn’t about just any cable tie, I’m talking about Kino Flo ties.

Everyone thinks of Rip Tie when they think of brand name cable ties, but I like these specific Kino Flo ones. They’re 12 inches long, which seems large, but it’s just the right size. They have a little slot punched out of one end, which allows you to feed the narrower end through. This enables you to fasten them around a cable, so you can open up and unravel the cable, but the velcro tie itself won’t fall off. I’ve been buying and using these things for years. They rock. They come in gray, blue, green, red, white, and yellow. And before you think to yourself: “$17 for 20 velcro cable ties? What the hell?” Remember, these are all alternatives to fruitcake. You will use these and they will rock.

Here’s a five more gift ideas that will please anyone who reads this blog:

6) A big ole’ honking roll of Gaffer’s Tape. Pure holiday delight! Why not?

7) A Surefire Defender Flashlight. Hey, audio people need to see crap too! This flashlight is super bright, and it’s really badass too. It’s got teeth on the end of it so you can use it as a weapon in a fight. There’s almost no chance this would ever happen, but audio nerds thrive on unused features.

8 ) A Leatherman Wave. I’ve had mine for four years now. I love it to death. The greatest thing about it is the little scissors. I’ve used them 10 million times.

9) The Cable Organizer. This is basically a flexible tube that you can feed cables into. It makes them very neat and pretty looking. I guess if the audio nerd in your life is a total slob, they may not love this gift, but I think it’s great. Yes, I own this too. I use it to hide the cables that connect our Vizio LCD TV set to my audio system. It’s a wonderful solution.

10) Sony 7506 Headphones with Deluxe Earpads. Every audio nerd already owns headphones, but none of them would mind having another pair. The 7506 is the most commonly used headphones in our industry, so they’re a really safe bet for any audio geek. This kit with the additional Auray Deluxe Earpads is the clincher. They make the headphones 10 times more comfortable. In fact, if you already have 7506, just getting the Deluxe Earpads by themselves is an awesome, inexpensive gift. It’s like getting a whole new set of headphones.

Thanks for checking out this list. If you have any gift ideas that I didn’t include, please post them in the Comments section! Stay tuned to www.sam-mallery.com for more posts about rad gifts for video and photo nerds in the near future.